Married to a Knife | Nikah Pisau

By and | 4 November 2012

Married to a Knife

i have arrived somewhere, spinning
in a labyrinth, it was a long journey,
without a map. and the darkness
is perfect. I followed a lane
between a river and a chasm.

there was a scream. it sounded like a song.
perhaps it came from my mouth. there was a moan,
like a lullaby. perhaps it came from my mouth.

but i have landed in a place
of perfect alienation: your body is covered with maggots
which i ignore. until i find complete
sexual satisfaction. then i finish you too,
i stab you in the heart and
tear off your prick
in my pain.

Nikah Pisau

aku sampai entah di mana. berputarputar
dalam labirin. perjalanan terpanjang
tanpapeta. dan inilah warna gelap paling
sempurna. kuraba gang di antara sungai
dan jurang.

ada jerit, serupa nyanyi. mungkin dari
mulutku sendiri. kudengar erangan, serupa
senandung. mungkin dari mulutku sendiri.

tapi inilah daratan dengan keasingan paling
sempurna: tubuhmu yang bertaburan ulatulat,
kuabaikan. sampai kurampangkan kenikmatan
sanggama. sebelum merampungkankanmu juga, menikam
jantung dan merobek zakarmu, dalam segala
ngilu.

1992

English translation by Harry Aveling

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