Being out with new couples
reminds me of monotremes

They oftentimes speak of falling
in and making kissyface love

They gab a fragrant
arrow of shit, too

with the same cupid mouths

SIMPER MALLEY’s rapier and acerbic social observations are oftentimes mistaken for Bill Bryson-esque whinging. This is not the case. Bolstered by surviving the crushing poverty and abandonment of his youth, Simper exploded onto the global literary atlas in the early sixties with unmatched bravado. His Making Hamburger from Freshwater Trout while Fishing America for Pert, Young Chicks, published 1966, affords him to rest forever on his laurels in the public view; a perch he was never comfortable with as he felt his later work was far superior to his earlier successes. Simper Malley bought the farm, in every sense, in 1983. This is his most recent, posthumous publication. Montana misses him greatly.

REVEALED!
As reported on Cordite News Explosion, we are humbled and disappointed to announce that this poem was in fact written by Kent MacCarter.