Johnny Depp owns an island

A-Ha, the band that sang Take on Me collectively

Own an island while The Lonely Island

Do not own one, Marlon Brando,

Who is dead, is on the list of island owners

Leonardo DiCaprio, Ricky Martin,

Robin Williams—also dead

Maybe this list is outdated

It features washed-out google images

Of the celebrities next to aerial views of their islands

Which look like supergreen salads or planets

Or salad-planets or cross sections of

Planet Hollywood billboards

So far away or so close-up

There’s an implied sense we as observers are

Exiled from these 200×200-pixel images

High-contrast oversaturated unattainable

Properties shining like beacons from a

2003 we can never access

In circles where buying an island is an acceptable form of self-care

A lifestyle choice we can rage against but never zoom in on

Maybe I should look at another list maybe I should—
Picking your nose really thoroughly as self-care

Watching an entire season of Queer Eye without moving as self-care

Making yourself a really healthy dinner and

Eating it too quickly to get indigestion

As self-care, at what point does your

Self-care grow a thirst that cannot be quenched

By coconut oil or yoga, at what point does a man

Become an island dressed inappropriately in a Hawaiian shirt

Unbuttoned, bare belly viewed from above like Mao

Drifting down the Yangtze to prove it’s not toxic

The Galapagos rising out of the sea like fat

Tortoise asses revealing themselves to Charles Darwin

Revealing himself to Richard Dawkins

Exposing himself to every old white man who

Thought his ideas more important than

Having values, at what point am I just giving in to the

Decadence of my sadness like eating a really

Nice ass-cake sprinkled with islands inhabited by my own

Feelings drowning them in stomach acid torching

The villages burning the villagers

How many times

Will I swallow before I sink