A Poet Once More
I found strands of your hair, Melva, in Karang Setra
On the smooth ceramic floor. I always think of you
When I see ads for soap, shampoo, and toothpaste
Or dangdut singers on the tv.
Now, alone in this hotel, I feel myself to be
A poet once more. The intoxicating scent of your perfume
Slipping suddenly through the bathroom door
Attacks me like lines of poetry.
You know, Melva, words always make me tremble
And the strange scents from your nape, neck, and armpits
Have now turned into words.Now, alone in this hotel, I feel myself to be
A poet once more. I carefully place the brown strands of hair
On the table, alongside the papers,
The cigarettes, and the cup of coffee. And then,
Still feeling your lips on my mouth
Your voice still filling my ears and mind, I write a poem.
Remembering the color of your shoes,
Your underwear, your bra, and the belt
You once left beneath the bed
As a way of saying goodbye, I write a poem.No, Melva, a poet is not sad for being abandoned
Or from the pain because in the end such things do pass
The poet does not weep for being betrayed
Or fall unconscious because his mouth has been silenced
A poet does not die from his words’ loss of strength
Or because his powerful words will have turned into prose:
Becoming, for instance, unending war
Hijackings, plane crashes, floods, and earthquakes
Or, for instance, the never-ending corruption of this country
The mayhem, the looting, the rapes, or whateverIt’s just that I am alone here and feel myself to be a poet once more
Menjadi Penyair Lagi
Melva, di Karang Setra, kutemukan helai-helai ratnbutmu
Di lantai keramik yang licin. Aku selalu terkenang kepadamu
Sedap melihat iklan sabun, shampo atau pasta gigi
Atau setiap menyaksikan penyanyi dangdut di televisi
Kini aku sendirian di hotel ini dan merasa
Menjadi penyair lagi. Bau parfummu yang memabukkan
Tiba-tiba menyelinap lewat pintu kamar mandi
Dan menyerbuku bagaikan baris-baris puisi
Kau tahu, Melva, aku selalu gemetar oleh kata-kata
Sedang bau aneh dari tengkuk, leher dan ketiakmu itu
Telah menjelmakan kata-kata jugaKini aku sendirian di hotel ini dan merasa
Menjadi penyair lagi. Helai-helai rambutmu yang kecoklatan
Kuletakkan dengan hati-hati di atas meja
Bersama kertas, rokok dan segelas kopi. Lalu kutulis puisi
Ketika kurasakan bibirmu masih tersimpan di mulutku
Ketika suaramu masih memenuhi telinga dan pikiranku
Kutulis puisi sambil mengingat-ingat warna sepatu
Celana dalam, kutang serta ikat pinggangmu
Yang dulu kautinggalkan di bawah ranjang
Sebagai ucapan selamat tinggalTidak, Melva, penyair tidak sedih karena ditinggalkan
Juga tidak sakit karena akhirnya selalu dikalahkan
Penyair tidak menangis karena dikhianati
Juga tidak pingsan karena mulutnya dibungkam
Penyair akan mati apabila kehilangan tenaga kata-kata
Atau kata-kata saktinya berubah menjadi prosa:
Misalkan peperangan yang tak henti-hentinya
Pembajakan, pesawat jatuh, banjir atau gempa bumi
Misalkan korupsi yang tak habis-habisnya di negeri ini
Kerusuhan, penjarahan, perkosaan atau semacamnyaO, aku sendirian di sini dan merasa menjadi penyair lagi
English translation by John H. McGlynn
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