Here’s a day I’d like to have back: the first
weekend we stayed at Flock Hill – Ken and Rob,
the gang from the Harbour – in the shepherd’s
cottage with Andy and Liz. The dawn of
the decade, a tawny February,
Jimmy Carter was still in the White House,
I was six months back from Sydney, full of
Sunday, first thing, grey
and foggy, Rob and I got our hands on
a threadline and caught a brace of skinny
little brook trout to take home for breakfast
(hippie stoneware and gumboot tea at the
big formica table in the Lockwood
kitchen). Andy killed a sheep for the dogs
and stood a while talking to the boss who
pulled up in his Range Rover. ‘Andrew, you’re
not going to work today’, warned Liz, and
he waved her away, laughing shyly. Ken
said, ‘Hey Sis, where’s your guitar?’ and Liz came
out with her lovely old Maton, and rolled
up a joint – she was pregnant, not smoking, but the
rest of us got stoned as crickets – and she
fetched her autoharp as well, and out came
the old family songbook. And we were
Back then, to hear Ken play
guitar, his flat-picking so crisp and sure;
and Andy, cigarette glued to his lip
as he rattled off those locomotive
banjo rolls, Earl Scruggs in hobnails and home-
spun jumper, tearing into ‘Eight Miles to
Louisville’ and ‘Armadillo Breakdown’.
Then Ken on mandolin, Liz on guitar
and singing, her fluid soprano, un-
studied and effortless.
So . . . did part of
me want to say Aw c’mon! to that bad,
old white-trash gospel? Maybe. Yet I was
hearing something else as I gazed out the
window of that kitset kitchen at the
wide hay paddock opening green where it
sloped to the lake at the foot of the blond
mountain. Giants had laboured here, it seemed,
and left behind hay-bales tall as houses,
hay to feed every last sheep in the
high country, broadcast over the prairie
like megalithic knucklebones. And the
cottage echoed with our sober joy, and
as Ken’s mandolin figures flowed like spring
water and those tight, lonesome harmonies
lifted the roof, I knew, as you do when
you’re high, that, yes, I was family too.
But what can I say about the City,
its vapours, its wickedness? There, once again,
we were mostly confounded. We took off
our clothes and played our instruments in the street.
Sometimes months would turn into years as we
failed to accomplish the simplest thing. As if
our young bodies would forgive us anything, we steeped
them in poisons and tortured them with improvised jewellery.
Vehicles were driven heroically:
to Kaikoura for a crayfish, to the Coast for a plait of garlic,
to the badlands of Bishopdale to liberate a cactus
and render it down to a noisome liquor.
Friends embraced, then sheared off,
trailing cinders. One joined an oil firm and learned to use a sjambok;
others found the saffron-coloured East and set out to fuck their way
to enlightenment. A climber was last seen hefting an ice-axe,
face an ardent cathode blue, carving
footholds in the lath-and-plaster as if he meant to walk upside-down
on the ceiling. One fell asleep with his head in a bass bin
and woke with an evil tinnitus he mistook for the voice of God.
Bait-fishers, skate-punks and other degenerates
crowded the lanes of the liquormart.
Diet pills flattered the will to intelligence.
One joined the army for a weekend but later thought better of it.
We had not given up on our elders, but their choices
were now unhelpful: they handed in their weapons
and worked for the government; a cousin
imported half a pound of heroin and left it on the tarmac.
beavered away at a fictitious fiction the size of a
garage, and no one was so indelicate as to inquire
when it was likely to be completed.
Still, despite everything, we looked to the mountains.
Thick cream of winter, blue of mid-summer,
we’d climb to the rim of the harbour
simply to feast our eyes on them.
From Mt Aspiring to Tapuaenuku, their granite
imperative ringed the horizon, and Erewhon,
Kekerengu, Algidus, Flock Hill, the names of
those elevated stations were one more voice in our confusion.
- FREE: 20 Poets anthology
- 91: NO THEME VIIISUBMIT to C Gaskin 90: MONSTERwith N Curnow, coming soon! 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith Fiona Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith Vladimir Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith Judith Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith Keri Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with Dan Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with Pam Brown 52.0: TOIL with Carol Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with Luke Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with Bonny Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with John Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with Tracy Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with Corey Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with Michael Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with Felicity Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with Jan Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with Derek Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with Kent MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with Ann Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with Gig Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with Duncan Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with Kent MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with Libby Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with Sarah Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with Sam Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with Astrid Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with Sean Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with Alan Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with Jill Jones
- Review Short: Simeon Kronenberg’s Distance
- Review Short: Judith Beveridge’s Sun Music: New and Selected Poems
- Melody Paloma Reviews Keri Glastonbury
- Submission to Cordite 91: NO THEME VIII
- Judith Bishop Reviews Phillip Hall’s Fume
- Bella Li on as Associate Publisher
- Alex Creece on as Production Editor
- Review Short: Diane Fahey’s November Journal and Carmen Leigh Keates’s Meteorites
- Review Short: Vahni Capildeo’s Seas and Trees and Jennifer Harrison’s Air Variations
- To Outlive a Home: Poetics of a Crumbling Domestic
- ‘The Rally Is Calling’: Dashiell Moore Interviews Lionel Fogarty
- Jackie Ryan: Teaser to Burger Force 3
- Dispatch from the Future Fish
- Introduction to Cordite 89: DOMESTIC
- 7 Portraits by Ali Gumillya Baker
- Selections from 3 Yhonnie Scarce Series
- Kathy Acker and The Viewing Room
- To Live There: on ‘Dispatch from the Future Fish’
- The Wild Workshop: The Ghost of a Brontëan Childhood in the Life of Dorothy Hewett
- Externalising the Symptom: Radicalised Youth and The Membrane
- On Deep Breaths and Friends Forever: Im/materiality and Mis/communication in Happy Angels Revisited
- Letter to Anne Carson: Work of Remembrance and Mourning
- Translated Extracts from Chantal Danjou
- Translations from Old English
- The Poets: Pejk Malinovski Self-translates
- Carnage, Crosses and Curiosity: 13 Images by Yvette Holt
- Body of Sound