I never met the poet Francis Webb, who lived in my hometown of Semaphore when I was a child, but I later concocted this fiction for
another Webb-gripped poet, Richard Hillman.
Frankly i didn’t know if Jim was
telling the truth
or simply weaving a web
laced with lies & deceit
but as i sat there smoking
cigarettes in his Semaphore backyard
he pointed out the Jacaranda tree
where Francis would hang his red Speedos
out to dry
he’d just sling them over that low branch
just above head height
& he talked about how the colour contrasted
wildly with the green
& he described in detail the aqua blue
full-face diving mask he’d wear
& how it was slightly frayed
around the edges & how it left red welts
across his face that lasted for an hour or more
making him look somewhat grotesque
& i drifted with the smoke . . .
& thought of nothing but himi was jolted when he said that Francis
had the biggest snorkel in Semaphore ––
i laughed aloud & commented
that i thought Francis was definitely gay
& went on to say how he’d smashed
chairs to toothpicks in the past when
challenged on that point
but i was told smartly in return
that Francis loved a challenge
& how they’d dive the Semaphore reef
& harpoon sharks on steamy summer afternoons
& how Francis could swim for miles
with an ease & natural grace that most
sporting men enviedbut he told me too of his dark side ––
one incident that quickly came to pass
was how one broiling January afternoon
when too many long-necks had been emptied
& thrown with wild abandon into the overgrown
buffalo grass
that the landlord had appeared looking stern
& began a lecture on moderation & temperance ––
it was all too much for Francis
who waved his harpoon in his direction
& screamed desist you bugger desist
& began to chase him around the backyard
with a stream of other even more foul
& cutting obscenities
& how within the hour two coppers
arrived on a motorbike & sidecar
booting it up the driveway & waving their
truncheons at Francis who by this time was
staggering exhaustedly around the backyard
in his once white ‘y’ fronts & wielding
his own weapon
calling the landlord a cunt repeatedly
(& rather loudly it should be said)
much to the utter disgust of the
woodcutter who lived next door
(who was always thought to have called
the police but who of course ––
on later questioning
would never put his hand up ––
though some did suggest it may have been his wifeit was shortly after this event that the
harpoon was strapped to the last pylon
on the northern side of the Semaphore jetty ––
just below the waterline at low tide
(suffice to say that the charges were
subsequently dropped perhaps due to the
lack of substantial evidence)
but they say too ––
that sometimes when the water clears
& the Semaphore sun is bright
that if you swing out far enough over
the jetty railing
you can see a leather belt with a brass
buckle about a metre below the waterline ––
but as for that harpoon
it is no-where to be seen.
- 115: SPACE
with A Sometimes
114: NO THEME 13
with J Toledo & C Tse
113: INVISIBLE WALLS
with A Walker & D Disney
112: TREAT
with T Dearborn
111: BABY
with S Deo & L Ferney
110: POP!
with Z Frost & B Jessen
109: NO THEME 12
with C Maling & N Rhook
108: DEDICATION
with L Patterson & L Garcia-Dolnik
107: LIMINAL
with B Li
106: OPEN
with C Lowe & J Langdon
105: NO THEME 11
with E Grills & E Stewart
104: KIN
with E Shiosaki
103: AMBLE
with E Gomez and S Gory
102: GAME
with R Green and J Maxwell
101: NO THEME 10
with J Kinsella and J Leanne
100: BROWNFACE
with W S Dunn
99: SINGAPORE
with J Ip and A Pang
97 & 98: PROPAGANDA
with M Breeze and S Groth
96: NO THEME IX
with M Gill and J Thayil
95: EARTH
with M Takolander
94: BAYT
with Z Hashem Beck
93: PEACH
with L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong
92: NO THEME VIII
with C Gaskin
91: MONSTER
with N Curnow
90: AFRICAN DIASPORA
with S Umar
89: DOMESTIC
with N Harkin
88: TRANSQUEER
with S Barnes and Q Eades
87: DIFFICULT
with O Schwartz & H Isemonger
86: NO THEME VII
with L Gorton
85: PHILIPPINES
with Mookie L and S Lua
84: SUBURBIA
with L Brown and N O'Reilly
83: MATHEMATICS
with F Hile
82: LAND
with J Stuart and J Gibian
81: NEW CARIBBEAN
with V Lucien
80: NO THEME VI
with J Beveridge
57.1: EKPHRASTIC
with C Atherton and P Hetherington
57: CONFESSION
with K Glastonbury
56: EXPLODE
with D Disney
55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUS
with M Chakraborty and K MacCarter
55: FUTURE MACHINES
with Bella Li
54: NO THEME V
with F Wright and O Sakr
53.0: THE END
with P Brown
52.0: TOIL
with C Jenkins
51.1: UMAMI
with L Davies and Lifted Brow
51.0: TRANSTASMAN
with B Cassidy
50.0: NO THEME IV
with J Tranter
49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH
with M Hall and S Seita
49.0: OBSOLETE
with T Ryan
48.1: CANADA
with K MacCarter and S Rhodes
48.0: CONSTRAINT
with C Wakeling
47.0: COLLABORATION
with L Armand and H Lambert
46.1: MELBOURNE
with M Farrell
46.0: NO THEME III
with F Plunkett
45.0: SILENCE
with J Owen
44.0: GONDWANALAND
with D Motion
43.1: PUMPKIN
with K MacCarter
43.0: MASQUE
with A Vickery
42.0: NO THEME II
with G Ryan
41.1: RATBAGGERY
with D Hose
41.0: TRANSPACIFIC
with J Rowe and M Nardone
40.1: INDONESIA
with K MacCarter
40.0: INTERLOCUTOR
with L Hart
39.1: GIBBERBIRD
with S Gory
39.0: JACKPOT!
with S Wagan Watson
38.0: SYDNEY
with A Lorange
37.1: NEBRASKA
with S Whalen
37.0: NO THEME!
with A Wearne
36.0: ELECTRONICA
with J Jones