Dear Teri
I am not really in love with Charlie, but
I think I am obsessed, but
I can’t say it is entirely pleasurable
It is not like wine or chocolate
It is more like picking off skin after a bad sunburn
He is everything
He is the Prince of Egypt, he is Moses, he is Marc Antony, Henry the VIII and Judah Ben Hur
He is John the Baptist, Buffalo Bill and Michelangelo
He is Captain Colt Saunders, Major Dundee and General Charles Gordon
He has the ear of Nefertiti, Pope Julius II, King Louis XIII, Jesus and even God
He runs the Cavalry and the circus, a ranch and a space craft
He is the Last Man on Earth
He tells me I used to be a nice guy, my contract has been cancelled, my wish is his will, my fragrance is like the wine of Babylon, my eyes are as sharp as they are beautiful and my intelligence service is excellent.
He tells me I think I can compete with a man’s work, saved him from a fanatic, plan ahead and take a hell of a long time to say goodbye.
He tells me I am the one, the lord, alright, a liar, a dream, a traitor, an honest cop, a would be cavalier and a hell of a piece of furniture.
He tells me I am as blind as the colonel, dead right, evil, not good enough, pretty when I’m angry, the last man that can answer and the only girl in town.
He tells me I am not as smart as Stewart, a man of mercy or worthy.
He asks me if I’m alright, can write, a policeman and eager to marry.
He asks me if I have hot water, a reason, a gun and a report.
He tells me I have gotta tell em, I have marriage all figured out, permission to marry, lived longer than anyone ever born and left out the main ingredient.
He tells me I should be careful, go down on my knees, glue myself together, have been less loyal and expand my vocabulary.
He tells me I can like who I want, buy some people, make jokes, file a claim and cut pieces out of him.
He tells me I can’t win alone, make deals, sweep the carcass under the rug or make that much money.
He tells me to tell him, tell everybody, try to get some sleep, take the camp dog, turn the air conditioner all the way up, wait and see and watch myself.
He tells me I shall drink bitter waters, get my cut, see hail fall from a clear sky and stand in judgement with the other sinners.
He tells me he is a Florentine, a soldier, a shepherd, a Jew, a scientist, a narcissist, a civilian and sick of me.
He tells me he is nothing, different, alive, immune, grateful, hungry, finished and gentle with horses.
He tells me he is sorry, lonely, afraid, looking for a wife, looking for a girl and a little boy and the only game in town.
He tells me he is not sorry, afraid, prepared to die or kneeling to a princess.
He tells me he is not the man, a religious man, a violent man, a loving man, drinking tea or Billy Graham.
He tells me he will be back, be alright, come back tomorrow, get the children, induce vomiting, paint the truth and have to kill me sometime.
He tells me he will not be here forever, give her up, obey, rest or leave a man to die in the mud.
He asks me for permission and something to drink.
He tells me he has orders, leads, proof, work to do, important things to do, business with Rome and the right to take me.
He tells me he has no wealth, wives, regrets, authority, king or official capacity.
He tells me he can live, imagine, hardly draw breath, get to the river camp and only tell me what he knows.
He tells me he cannot choose, leave it, speak the language, leave Khartoum, change his conception or give more blood.
He tells me he wants a horse, food and water, every prisoner, every European, volunteers, her and to be told.
He tells me that he may have to see me again.
Film Credits
Ruby Gentry (Boake Tackman) 1952
Arrowhead (Ed Bannon) 1953
The Ten Commandments (Moses, 1956
Three Violent People (Capt Colt Saunders) 1957
Touch of Evil (Ramond Miguel Vargus) 1957
The Big Country (Steve Leech) 1958
Ben Hur (Judah Ben Hur) 1958
The Greatest Story Ever Told (John the Baptist) 1963
The Agony and the Ecstasy (Michelangelo) 1963
Major Dundee (Major Dundee) 1965
The War Lord (Chrysagon) 1965
Khartoum (General Charles Gordon) 1966
Planet of the Apes (George Taylor) 1968
The Omega Man (Robert Neville) 1971
Soylent Green (Detective Robert Thorn) 1972
The Three Musketeers (Cardinal Richelieu) 1973
Earthquake (Stewart Graff) 1974
Midway (Captain Mathew Garth) 1975
