You are what you eat so if you see me munging
on a hypertrophied human arm in the wee hours
behind a sand dune, no you didn’t. Excuse me
while I shimmy into something a little less knowable.
Speaking of which, close all your eyes. Flood your
mouth with saliva. Hold it. Allow your hand to fall across
an expensive bottle of sun cream. Listen for the city
laughing at its buildings. Now, be a darling
and spit. You are what you eat so I guess it’s time I ate
myself? Nom … nom … nom?
I want to tell you so many things but my teeth
fly out of my face at warp speed. Not enough hours
in the day, which is to say conduct a prayer ceremony for
Search Engine Optimisation by washing your horrid bathmat
and use it barefoot straight out of the dryer so nice.
It’s bin night so there’s that to look forward to as well.
This message and everything on this page
is an ad. Go here to end. Stub your second biggest
toe on the corner of the post office. (Required.) Nobody
tells you the itch is hereditary, that the link is coming from
inside the biography. If you like this, you might also like
the headache from eating ice cream too fast. Sit back and
look at the word going and say it out loud in the style of boing.
Play the Theremin with a boneless puck
of chicken.
You are what you eat so I guess it’s time I ate an exhausted
whoopie cushion? Summon onomatopoeia? In this climate?
Sir, this is Wellbeing Wednesday. Let them eat pizza. Nom, nom,
nom, etc. I might be two-faced but I wear one snood. Why are we
always doing things? You know how you hurtle
birthdaytowardbirthday
umbilical turn numerical
I’m wondering if you might do that one more time
with no feeling. Recall the erupted fog.
So very un-fog-like to erupt, isn’t it? Why are we always
doing things that could be interpreted as symptoms? We are
almost never in a helicopter orbiting a multi-story casino or
rissole? What’s with that? Shell fragments and slow sand
stuck in our ears. A few more payslips
and we can start applying for a new
place. You are what you eat so eat your friendversary? It is
easier to imagine the end of capitalism than a dry bathmat so eat
a dry bathmat? The trouble with nightmaring across a field
is the desire to smooch your own fractures. The thought of a
list. A trapped nerve indexed. Onlookers gasping in awe. Failed
empty file. Cossid larvae pattering the linoleum like big rain. Coins
dumped in the sink. Is this loud enough? Everything will be okay
for your landlord. Disappoint the oldest person you know by texting
them: Sorry but I can’t make it tonight. I’m a graphic designer. The sky
splitting up like parents. You have memories to look back on today
(content unavailable right now). This message and everything on this
page is bad. Hold me close and
lol. What in the unsanctified insularity brings you here? Anti-ageing
agent? You can run but you can’t Dow Jones. You are what you eat
so eat the rich. haha.
See also: ha. You think this is funny?
This is a serious recipe for a hotdog made out of the same stuff as
a black hole. I want to tell you the story of the ocean trench at the
bottom of the deepest single use plastic bag. Today I have a caffeine
headache in my ass. Tomorrow you will enter a room carrying
nothing but crisp impermanence. How very dare you. I’ll have you
know days perish. Road tar softens. An empty cup suggests
water. There’s always a cloth getting dry somewhere. 3.4 billion
financial years ago a blob in the sea was the first thing to react to light.
Thanks blob. You were cool.
They say you are what you eat so eat a billionaire in space?
In space no one can hear you in space. Can’t remember anything
else. Can’t even remember what is like
eggs in the presence of hailstones.
Can’t remember a single thing.
Can’t shake the thought that when I smile
I’m manipulating muscles to expose a piece of my skull.
Notes:
This poem appeared in Secret Third Thing by Dan Hogan, published by Cordite Books in 2023.
A video version of this poem was a finalist in the 2020 Queensland Poetry Festival Film + Poetry Challenge, which can be viewed here.
‘You can run but you can’t Dow Jones’ is a reference to the line ‘You can run / but you can’t / aquarium’ from Stingray Clapping by Andrew Choate.
- 115: SPACE
with A Sometimes
114: NO THEME 13
with J Toledo & C Tse
113: INVISIBLE WALLS
with A Walker & D Disney
112: TREAT
with T Dearborn
111: BABY
with S Deo & L Ferney
110: POP!
with Z Frost & B Jessen
109: NO THEME 12
with C Maling & N Rhook
108: DEDICATION
with L Patterson & L Garcia-Dolnik
107: LIMINAL
with B Li
106: OPEN
with C Lowe & J Langdon
105: NO THEME 11
with E Grills & E Stewart
104: KIN
with E Shiosaki
103: AMBLE
with E Gomez and S Gory
102: GAME
with R Green and J Maxwell
101: NO THEME 10
with J Kinsella and J Leanne
100: BROWNFACE
with W S Dunn
99: SINGAPORE
with J Ip and A Pang
97 & 98: PROPAGANDA
with M Breeze and S Groth
96: NO THEME IX
with M Gill and J Thayil
95: EARTH
with M Takolander
94: BAYT
with Z Hashem Beck
93: PEACH
with L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong
92: NO THEME VIII
with C Gaskin
91: MONSTER
with N Curnow
90: AFRICAN DIASPORA
with S Umar
89: DOMESTIC
with N Harkin
88: TRANSQUEER
with S Barnes and Q Eades
87: DIFFICULT
with O Schwartz & H Isemonger
86: NO THEME VII
with L Gorton
85: PHILIPPINES
with Mookie L and S Lua
84: SUBURBIA
with L Brown and N O'Reilly
83: MATHEMATICS
with F Hile
82: LAND
with J Stuart and J Gibian
81: NEW CARIBBEAN
with V Lucien
80: NO THEME VI
with J Beveridge
57.1: EKPHRASTIC
with C Atherton and P Hetherington
57: CONFESSION
with K Glastonbury
56: EXPLODE
with D Disney
55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUS
with M Chakraborty and K MacCarter
55: FUTURE MACHINES
with Bella Li
54: NO THEME V
with F Wright and O Sakr
53.0: THE END
with P Brown
52.0: TOIL
with C Jenkins
51.1: UMAMI
with L Davies and Lifted Brow
51.0: TRANSTASMAN
with B Cassidy
50.0: NO THEME IV
with J Tranter
49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH
with M Hall and S Seita
49.0: OBSOLETE
with T Ryan
48.1: CANADA
with K MacCarter and S Rhodes
48.0: CONSTRAINT
with C Wakeling
47.0: COLLABORATION
with L Armand and H Lambert
46.1: MELBOURNE
with M Farrell
46.0: NO THEME III
with F Plunkett
45.0: SILENCE
with J Owen
44.0: GONDWANALAND
with D Motion
43.1: PUMPKIN
with K MacCarter
43.0: MASQUE
with A Vickery
42.0: NO THEME II
with G Ryan
41.1: RATBAGGERY
with D Hose
41.0: TRANSPACIFIC
with J Rowe and M Nardone
40.1: INDONESIA
with K MacCarter
40.0: INTERLOCUTOR
with L Hart
39.1: GIBBERBIRD
with S Gory
39.0: JACKPOT!
with S Wagan Watson
38.0: SYDNEY
with A Lorange
37.1: NEBRASKA
with S Whalen
37.0: NO THEME!
with A Wearne
36.0: ELECTRONICA
with J Jones