in april, it’s everywhere, palm-fed. little cheek kisses before parting,
dangling arms & laced fingers, mouths open/wanting/painless
in the new sunlight. backs on burnt concrete, sudden springtime
grazed against the window. feigning campus indie movie
as you lay your morning-body across her, breathing the taste
of her throat all afternoon. an echo on your tongue in class,
something even mint can’t muffle. it’s all about haphazardness,
splaying out in the fields, pollen in your knotty hair & an itch
run up your skin,
red-gleam hives up your neck,
benadryl in your teeth, falling asleep with your head in her grassy
lap. it’s all anyone talks about, whispers rushing through these halls—
the squeak of a dorm bed, hushed/giggling/unconcerned, the thawing.
not only the having, but
how i leave him on the crosswalk with only the memory
of my clumsy rejection, walking off in forged assurance/indifference/
disinterest in a palm pressed hot to mine. how i pool in anesthesia
for the weekend. all my latest loves are trapped in cinema,
glossy & impossible, like her body swarming up the stairs
with hair surging loose around her shoulders—
of course i long for this.
the slant of the camera across her torso, how she pauses at the window,
blinks at the tumbling snow, only polymer, only distance, cut & edited.
fuck if i never find it in me to lie all day in someone else’s sweat,
old smells caught on my inhaled breaths, erasing all prayers of pining.
- 108: DEDICATIONwith L Patterson & L Garcia-Dolnik 107: LIMINALwith B Li 106: OPENwith C SLowe & J Langdon 105: NO THEME 11with E Grills & E Stewart 104: KINwith E Shiosaki 103: AMBLEwith E Gomez and S Gory 102: GAMEwith R Green and J Maxwell 101: NO THEME 10with J Kinsella and J Leanne 100: BROWNFACE with W S Dunn 99: SINGAPOREwith J Ip and A Pang 97 & 98: PROPAGANDAwith M Breeze and S Groth 96: NO THEME IXwith M Gill and J Thayil 95: EARTHwith M Takolander 94: BAYTwith Z Hashem Beck 93: PEACHwith L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong 92: NO THEME VIIIwith C Gaskin 91: MONSTERwith N Curnow 90: AFRICAN DIASPORAwith S Umar 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith F Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith V Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith J Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith K Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with D Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with P Brown 52.0: TOIL with C Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with L Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with B Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with J Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with T Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with C Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with M Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with F Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with J Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with D Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with K MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with A Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with G Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with D Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with K MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with L Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with S Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with S Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with A Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with S Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with A Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with J Jones