a (mostly) found poem
Your lover has been made in Sri Lanka
and conforms to British Quality Standard BS1970.
Features include superior one-piece moulded construction
and a ribbed surface to control heat release.
Your lover is a safe and natural way to keep warm
or may be used for therapeutic purposes.
Instructions: Do not use boiling water.
Recommended temperature should not exceed 42 degrees.
Hold your lover by the neck in an upright position.
Do not fill using the domestic hot water system –
this can considerably shorten the life of your lover.
Do not place anything on top of your lover
including sharp or heavy objects.
Prevent contact with hot surfaces and naked flames
Do not use in microwave ovens.
Prevent contact with oil and grease.
Drain your lover completely.
Prevent exposure to sunlight.
Check for wear and damage at regular intervals.
Warning: Your lover can cause burns.
Avoid direct, prolonged contact with the skin.
Thank-You for Choosing this Product
1 July 2009