At last, a day of spring light.
It turns gold around 5 or 6 o clock as it goes.
The squarish shadows as it goes
upwards in a chunk.
The buildings are so solid here.
I cross the lawn and through glass doors down spiralling fans of stairs into the library
basement seeking out his poems. Their warmth. I pause on the picture of Auckland.
The clocktower flanked by tips of trees. The sky blank blue behind.
His name in the contents. Open to page 243.
No sound. I used to have him reading aloud. ‘Starfish Streets’. I used to walk
along, matching the march of my untutored feet to the beat of his voice on my
mp3. He told of an old town full of ghosts. His voice froze at that moment.
Pause. Play. At a touch melting into Brunswick, soundwaves lap, soothe, pull
me back. A vivid private track on repeat. I followed word for word.
2am, hands clacking the tips from that dodgy pizza place.
Another just for now.
Sweet hurt heart shapes
spotted in thought clouds
leading back to Aotearoa.
Auckland. The clocktower
The scrumpy tree near.
Afternoon. Sun. Some girl.
Hot librarian. Definitely flirts. This could be my chance
to fuck in the staff-only room.
and if we fast forward to the last scene.
Babies I guess. Dog. House. Lawn.
Dot dot dot. Debt debt debt.
Outside it is dark, but not as cold as I’d thought
walking back across the evening grass.
- 102: GAMESUBMIT with J Maxwell and R Green 101: NO THEME 10COMING SOON with J Kinsella and J Leanne 100: BROWNFACE with W S Dunn 99: SINGAPOREwith J Ip and A Pang 97 & 98: PROPAGANDAwith M Breeze and S Groth 96: NO THEME IXwith M Gill and J Thayil 95: EARTHwith M Takolander 94: BAYTwith Z Hashem Beck 93: PEACHwith L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong 92: NO THEME VIIIwith C Gaskin 91: MONSTERwith N Curnow 90: AFRICAN DIASPORAwith S Umar 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith F Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith V Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith J Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith K Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with D Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with P Brown 52.0: TOIL with C Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with L Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with B Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with J Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with T Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with C Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with M Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with F Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with J Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with D Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with K MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with A Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with G Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with D Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with K MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with L Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with S Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with S Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with A Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with S Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with A Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with J Jones