Ballet In a Hair Shirt

By | 29 June 2008

A sharp little mountain peak
capped with bare rock draws hikers.
Halfway up, I unfold a map.
A complex of dense modern towns
straddles a narrow green river
with only two or three bridges
in twenty miles of urban mass.
Parade City, one of those towns,
consists mainly of an open space
ringed by streets named for generals
like Germanicus, Kosciuszko, Grant.
Folger is warped with factories,
big crosshatched rectangles hogging
the good land by the river. Stevens,
named for the poet, makes a snarl
of difficult intersections
that look impossible to pass,
much like Reading, the poet's home town.
I reach the apex of rock and stare
into the valley and suffer
vertigo as salty as the sea.
What if I've imagined a town
called Stevens, and another
called Parade City, and a third
called Folger? What if that tangle
of streets below is actually
Reading, Pennsylvania? What if
this sharp little peak is a spur
of an ordinary coal ridge
in the heart of which a fire has burned
for almost a century? Dizzy
with my own effects, I lean
over a drop of several hundred
feet and force myself to vomit,
but nothing comes up. Nothing
except the conviction that the map
folded in my pocket hasn't lied,
and the town of Stevens lies below,
an actual place of people and things
on which I'm trying to bestow
everything that's troubling me.

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