For my girlfriend, English is her third language
and I imagine it getting the bronze medal, standing
next to Mandarin with the silver and Vietnamese
with the gold and Finnish not even being able
to compete as she doesn’t speak a word of it.
And for the anniversary of our first date she made me
an apron that said KILL THE COOK and I explained
the difference between KILL and KISS and she asked me
how long it takes someone to make an entire apron,
not just buying an apron and writing on it, but making
a whole apron, and she told me nothing was misspelled
on the gift that I bought her because I purchased
the spelling and I said that she didn’t misspell KISS
but rather turned it into another word and she took
the apron back on a day when I went to buy vermicelli
and grape juice and when I asked what she did with it
she told me that she kissed the apron and that I could
kill the apron good-bye and later when I tried to kiss her
she pulled away and said that she wanted to keep her lips,
that she did not want them to end up like the American dead,
how we put relatives in the ground and then keep them there
forever, that even our cemeteries are a prison system.
A couple of Thanksgivings later, we volunteered at a homeless
shelter, the one where she had donated the apron
and when she found it was no longer there, she got teary.
I asked why she was sad and she told me that she wasn’t sad,
that she never wanted to see me cry and that I would never
see her cry. I asked why she would say such a thing
and she just went back to cooking like our life depended on it.
- 102: GAMESUBMIT with J Maxwell and R Green 101: NO THEME 10COMING SOON with J Kinsella and J Leanne 100: BROWNFACE with W S Dunn 99: SINGAPOREwith J Ip and A Pang 97 & 98: PROPAGANDAwith M Breeze and S Groth 96: NO THEME IXwith M Gill and J Thayil 95: EARTHwith M Takolander 94: BAYTwith Z Hashem Beck 93: PEACHwith L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong 92: NO THEME VIIIwith C Gaskin 91: MONSTERwith N Curnow 90: AFRICAN DIASPORAwith S Umar 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith F Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith V Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith J Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith K Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with D Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with P Brown 52.0: TOIL with C Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with L Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with B Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with J Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with T Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with C Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with M Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with F Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with J Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with D Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with K MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with A Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with G Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with D Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with K MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with L Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with S Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with S Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with A Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with S Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with A Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with J Jones