This poem is from a much briefer series
on the life of the man who invented dirigibles
whose name is French, or Hungarian
I think. Dietrich Katona?
Please capitalize all the second and eighth letters
in this section. Note that
I am using a special font here – Strontium Victorian –
and you must make certain to keep the size at 7.2
and also capitalize all the names of fish,
except if freshwater.
You might be specially interested
in the following 1,368 rondelles
of which I am including a generous selection
The sequence on the invention of dice has been suppressed pending an investigation.
All the place names in the Confession Poems should be deleted,
to be replaced with Xs and long dashes.
Please fact check my biography.
Wyoming is spelled “Wyoming”.
“Hypo-allergenic” has a dash.
You might be intrigued to note that I am the winner of the following international poetry competitions and prizes:
1. THE WALDO VINCENT MEMORIAL HAIKU CONTEST;
2. MS. EUNICE HALIBURTON CHAPBOOK PRIZE FOR BEST FOURTH CHAPBOOK;
3. THE UNIVERSITY OF TANZANIAS INTERNATIONAL SONNET CONTEST;
4. UNESCO PRIZE FOR BEST VEGETABLE POEM;
5. JAKES AUTOBODY BIANNUAL FIRST BOOK AWARD;
6. DR. AND MRS. RADNOTIS ONE AND ONLY TOP POEM CHOICE;
7. DATGEISTS BEST, 1970.
The following poems have appeared
in NO POSSIBLE WAY; NEW AND FAIRLY RECENT LINES;
GODSQUAWK; ERGOMATIC; SUNSHINE STATE MARGINALIA;
CORPUS GUSSY; THE TROUBADOUR LIVES!; SKELETAL AFFLATUS;
BONGO CONGO MONGO; DELIRIUM TREMENDOUS; DATGEIST;
MR. FRIENDLY; MY NAME IS PETE AND I AM BI; ONLY TWICE;
LAST PETROL STATION FOR A HUNDRED MILES; ZOOMER.
(titles capitalized because I think it looks good).
You are welcome to choose any of the poems
but I would strongly suggest you choose the following:
i am not in favor of capital punishment; burning dolls, watering cans;
elegy for a dead amnesiac; seven ways of adjusting a corset;
the years following 1798, especially 1816, 1909 and 1972;
gadzooks! Why I Smoke Such Good Cigars and NO WOMEN CAN DO
THE DANCE LIKE A MAN ENTRANCED (please note the caps).
My name should be spelled in full, including all titles.
My photo is not included, but is available upon request
from the Department of Justice.
Thank you for your interest in my work, which
means a lot to me and my seven brothers,
who live near you, and are karate experts.
Dont be shy to tell me what you think.
And thank you once again. This is the only anthology
I have been asked to submit to.
Submit is such a funny word, isnt it?
I hope the poems on the death of tubercular infants
do not offend you. My sisters had this disease
and it is based on actual experience “recollected
in solitude” but you know how it goes.
Okay, I may have made some of it up.
But the pus on the collar is actually true.
I saw that.
I think the name may be Dieter Kazner.
Ill get back to you on that.
By the way, did you have a chance to check my poetry
web site: www.allfatgirlsconstantly.com?
It is not a sex site, dont worry. He he.
I am very interested in the photographs of your wife
on you site. Is she really that size?
Thank you again and send me a reply in six to seven hours
so I can tell the people I live with all about it.
I hope I wont have to put my disappointment hat
Yours, cheers, all the best, thank you, felicitations, signing off for now, have a good week-end, and much appreciated,
PS This is a nom de plume. My real name is different. It is Desmond Kattman Jr., but what do you think of Katboy? It makes me think of cats. It gets lots of “lovely ladies” interested at open mics.
- FREE: 20 Poets anthology
- 93: PEACHSUBMIT to L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong 92: NO THEME VIIIwith C Gaskin 91: MONSTERwith N Curnow 90: AFRO AUSTRALIANwith S Umar 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith F Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith V Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith J Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith K Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with D Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with P Brown 52.0: TOIL with C Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with L Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with B Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with J Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with T Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with C Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with M Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with F Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with J Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with D Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with K MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with A Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with G Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with D Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with K MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with L Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with S Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with S Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with A Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with S Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with A Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with J Jones
- NO THEME VIII Editorial
- ‘A means of resistance’: Susie Anderson Interviews Alison Whittaker
- 10 Works by Richard Bell
- Shipwrecks in Modern European Painting and Poetry: Radical Mobilisation of the Motif as Political Protest
- 4 Self-translations by Danijela Trajković
- Brutalism: Poems by Alex Creece
- Imperfect Growth: a Travel Log
- 4 Translated Kim Seung-hee Poems
- Residence: Dwelling with The Shards (an essay)
- The Shards
- in yr swimming pool
- Sonar for Conception
- The slow clock
- nanny on the water
- Vernal Funks & Bluffs
- I’d Have Called Her Sooner
- Call of Summer
- Sunday, call me a squid
- Mother Bird
- The Wrong Colour
- Milk River
- House fitting : surprisingly
- Farewell to Sweet Pea