The Decision

It’s decided, she’s going to do it and she won’t change her mind and she won’t listen to her mother, who will inevitably ask her do you know what you’re going to wear, my poor sweetie, it’s not easy in summer, should we go buy a few things if you need me don’t hesitate, and if you want I can help you with your hair, but one piece of advice, no makeup, it’s going to run and it won’t be pretty, and you’re really not looking well as it is, when it was your poor father, I wasn’t careful, and blah-blah-blah and yada yada yada, she knows the drill, her mother will go through her whole life story and it’ll be all gloom and doom, but no way will she take her advice, she’ll stick to her decision, and yet her oldest daughter, she’s going to poke her nose in too, she’ll ask so many questions she’ll end up finding out, that’s for sure, go run and tell her sisters, and then it’ll spin out of control, like, mom you won’t be comfortable and mom aren’t you going a little overboard, and are you sure, won’t you regret it, because, I mean yes, well of course, I understand, yes, of course I do, but all the same, how would that make us look, and in the end, well, mom yes, maybe you’re right that he would have liked that, but this isn’t the right moment, and I agree with you mom, you should do that, just maybe not that much or not now, or why don’t you wear it at night, afterwards, when it’s just us, because in there, in front of everyone, and blah-blah-blah and yada yada yada, she’s convinced her other daughters will start in too, although they’re more understanding and know deep down that she’s right, but it’s strange that they still care how things should done and how they should look, even the youngest, the most independent the most free-spirited, it’s surprising coming from her, but there she is too, like mom that’s not such a hot idea, are you really sure, and ding-ding-ding we’re off to the races again blah-blah-blah and yada yada yada and now it’s just such a pain, she knows all of this but what she really wants today is to decide all on her own what’s best for her, for both of them, so she’s laid everything out tonight (she couldn’t sleep), her outfit’s waiting on the bed, she doesn’t want to get dressed too early but the clock’s ticking, and oh damn, her granddaughter’s in the bathroom, she arrived last night to be with her, that was nice, but now this teenager’s just being annoying, will you hurry up and get out, well hot damn, grandma just look at your dress, it’s awesome, show me the ribbons for your hair, and go grab your high heels, you are slay, so slay, Grandpa would’ve loved those, too cool Gran, that dress looks incredible on you with that low neckline and those big flowers, let me see the open back, wow I totally want a dress like that, come here I’ll help you with your makeup, when Grandpa sees you from his coffin looking so beautiful he’ll be in heaven right away, and I’ll go change too, mom won’t be able to say a thing and it will be the most beautiful pink funeral in the world!