My god, I am so glad I did not marry you. I have never been happier to not be married to someone. To not be someone’s wife. I wake up every day singing Glory Glory Hallelujah, today I’m not your wife! I correct my students—it’s Miss! Not Mrs.—no near misses today! I turn to the empty pillow beside me and—oh hell, no I don’t! I don’t stare longingly at any spaces anymore—they’re not empty to me, Miss freedom fries and a shot of cold air! Glory be! Praise the lord! I awoke this morning unhitched! And tonight, when I go to sleep, I will dream only dreams enough for me. I mean, hot damn how unwedded am I? Is there a less married maiden than me? Unbridled nor brided, homeward and abounding! Christ almighty, hear my resounding rejoicery!

Is there a freer woman in this world than the one who kept the cat you hated?