of crisp new underwear made the night
inevitably dense. Whatever I sipped
from your mouth swirled into a fluorescent
world of waiting. I stayed indoors on the off chance
I was waiting for an idea. My hands stayed inside
my pockets. Everything was chasing
warmth. The world was on the cusp of losing
its nervousness until my eyes imagined
your body lounging on a beach chair
reading a novel and blood filled me
like fresh guilt. To my astounded friends
who asked me what the fuck
I was doing, I said I was going
with the flow. I wanted to be carried
by the world outside my door. I wanted
to carry my world inside it. It came as no surprise then
when the world crystallized into versions
of you, brisk and sturdy, full
of the unremarkable everyday—
small desperations and impulsive smirks.
When you waved your lit palm, I felt
like a child learning to read gestures, felt akin to those
who chose to feel, my chest besting its honesty
every passing moment of ravishing.
The jewel of each of my nipples rippled
their individual ambition. Whose eyes
delighted in this sinuous asymmetry?
It seemed there was a third pair
responsible for the blurring in the room.
The seer with a deeply pedestrian glare?
No, it was you smiling a terribly long smile
to sustain my waiting. At the door,
I thought waited some God who had
the perfect teeth, the niftiest brows,
the slenderest neck, in whose fear every night
I struggled to keep at bay the roaring
internet on my phone. Some days a mug
of beer kept my bladder busy, some days it lay
untouched. Most dusks I adored the air
the door let in. Some dinners it brought you along.
- 109: NO THEME 12with C Maling & N Rhook 108: DEDICATIONwith L Patterson & L Garcia-Dolnik 107: LIMINALwith B Li 106: OPENwith C Lowe & J Langdon 105: NO THEME 11with E Grills & E Stewart 104: KINwith E Shiosaki 103: AMBLEwith E Gomez and S Gory 102: GAMEwith R Green and J Maxwell 101: NO THEME 10with J Kinsella and J Leanne 100: BROWNFACE with W S Dunn 99: SINGAPOREwith J Ip and A Pang 97 & 98: PROPAGANDAwith M Breeze and S Groth 96: NO THEME IXwith M Gill and J Thayil 95: EARTHwith M Takolander 94: BAYTwith Z Hashem Beck 93: PEACHwith L Van, G Mouratidis, L Toong 92: NO THEME VIIIwith C Gaskin 91: MONSTERwith N Curnow 90: AFRICAN DIASPORAwith S Umar 89: DOMESTICwith N Harkin 88: TRANSQUEERwith S Barnes and Q Eades 87: DIFFICULTwith O Schwartz & H Isemonger 86: NO THEME VIIwith L Gorton 85: PHILIPPINESwith Mookie L and S Lua 84: SUBURBIAwith L Brown and N O'Reilly 83: MATHEMATICSwith F Hile 82: LANDwith J Stuart and J Gibian 81: NEW CARIBBEANwith V Lucien 80: NO THEME VIwith J Beveridge 57.1: EKPHRASTICwith C Atherton and P Hetherington 57: CONFESSIONwith K Glastonbury 56: EXPLODE with D Disney 55.1: DALIT / INDIGENOUSwith M Chakraborty and K MacCarter 55: FUTURE MACHINES with Bella Li 54: NO THEME V with F Wright and O Sakr 53.0: THE END with P Brown 52.0: TOIL with C Jenkins 51.1: UMAMI with L Davies and Lifted Brow 51.0: TRANSTASMAN with B Cassidy 50.0: NO THEME IV with J Tranter 49.1: A BRITISH / IRISH with M Hall and S Seita 49.0: OBSOLETE with T Ryan 48.1: CANADA with K MacCarter and S Rhodes 48.0: CONSTRAINT with C Wakeling 47.0: COLLABORATION with L Armand and H Lambert 46.1: MELBOURNE with M Farrell 46.0: NO THEME III with F Plunkett 45.0: SILENCE with J Owen 44.0: GONDWANALAND with D Motion 43.1: PUMPKIN with K MacCarter 43.0: MASQUE with A Vickery 42.0: NO THEME II with G Ryan 41.1: RATBAGGERY with D Hose 41.0: TRANSPACIFIC with J Rowe and M Nardone 40.1: INDONESIA with K MacCarter 40.0: INTERLOCUTOR with L Hart 39.1: GIBBERBIRD with S Gory 39.0: JACKPOT! with S Wagan Watson 38.0: SYDNEY with A Lorange 37.1: NEBRASKA with S Whalen 37.0: NO THEME! with A Wearne 36.0: ELECTRONICA with J Jones